Joke of the Day

mmaria

Buna dimineata si spor la toate, in saptamana asta! :*:*:*:*:*

25

What Are The Similarities Of Bar & Bra

Both words have the same letters;

Both are drinking zones;

Both have restricted timing for opening & closing;

More importantly, both makes men crazy when open.

25

A Perfect Substitute To Husbandly Problems

If you want someone who will eat whatever you put in front of him and never say it’s not quite as good as his mother’s then adopt a dog.

If you want someone always willing to go out, at any hour, for as long and wherever you want… then adopt a dog.

If you want someone who will never touch the remote, doesn’t care about football, and can sit next to you as you watch romantic movies then adopt a dog.

If you want someone who is content to get on your bed just to warm your feet and whom you can push off if he snores… then adopt a dog!

If you want someone who never criticizes what you do, doesn’t care if you are pretty or ugly, fat or thin, young or old, who acts as if every word you say is especially worthy of listening to, and loves you unconditionally, perpetually… then adopt a dog.

But, on the other hand, if you want someone who will never come when you call, ignores you totally when you come home, leaves hair all over the place, walks all over you, runs around all night and only comes home to eat and sleep, and acts as if your entire existence is solely to ensure his happiness… then adopt a cat!

25

This is a true story from the Japanese Embassy in US!!!

A few years ago, Prime Minister Mori was given some basic English conversation training before he visits Washington and meets president Bill Clinton…

The instructor told Mori Prime Minister, when you shake hand with President Clinton, please say ‘how r u’.

Then Mr. Clinton should say, ‘I am fine, and you?’ Now, you should say ‘me too’. Afterwards we, translators, will do the work for you.’

It looks quite simple, but the truth is…

When Mori met Clinton, he mistakenly said ‘Who r u?’ (instead of ‘How r u?’).

Mr. Clinton was a bit shocked but still managed to react with humor: ‘Well, I’m Hillary’s husband, ha-ha…’

Then Mori replied, ‘me too, ha-ha…’.

25

One Friday afternoon, two secretaries were hanging around the water cooler at the office. "Veronica, I just don't know what to do," Gloria said to her friend at work. "That good-looking Alex in accounting asked me out on a date for Saturday night. Should I go?"

"Oh, my God!" her friend exclaimed. "He'll wine you, dine you, and then use any ruse to get you up to his apartment. Then he'll rip off your dress and you'll have fantastic sex!"

"What should I do?" asked Gloria.

Her friend quickly replied, "Wear an old dress."

:)))) olddddd....

25

"How did it happen?" the doctor asked the middle-aged farmhand as he set the man's broken leg.
"Well, doc, 25 years ago..."
"Never mind the past! Tell me how you broke your leg this morning."
"Like I was saying... 25 years ago, when I first started working on the farm, that night, right after I'd gone to bed, the farmer's beautiful daughter came into my room.  She asked me if there was anything I wanted.
I said, "No, everything is fine."
"Are you sure?" she asked.
"I'm sure," I said.
"Isn't there anything I can do for you???" she wanted to know.
"I reckon not," I replied.
"Excuse me," said the doctor, "What the hell does this story have to do with your broken leg?!?!?"
"Well, this morning," the farmhand explained, "when it dawned on me what she meant, I fell off the roof!"


:)))))))) old & gold

25

What does it mean when a baby is born with teeth?
It means that the baby's mother may want to rethink her plans to nurse.

25

Men are from earth.
Women are from earth.

Deal with it.

=)))))

Darkinside

Unde-i puffarina :S

Benu

Mutulik, imi pare rau, dar asta a mai fost ales ca Bancul Zilei

felipes

Buna dimineata!
Dau eu o cafea!:D

maryjan

neatza , mercic de cofee

felipes

Hahahaha!!!

isavel

Sotul catre sotie:
− Ai vazut-o, draga, pe tanara aceea care zambea la mine?
Sotia:
− Nu-i nimic iubitule, si pe mine m-a bufnit rasul cand te-am vazut prima oara…

Benu

Buna dimineata!!! Din nou ;))
Sa va explic cum isi petrec unii timpul "liber" dintre zorii zilei si o sedinta:

"Shmoa:P: 'neata!
Geo: hei, lume noua
Geo: neata
Shmoa:P: sa ai un inceput de saptamana minunat :)
Shmoa:P: >:D<
Shmoa:P: ce lume noua?!? sunt mereu aici, tu lipsesti din cand in cand ;))
Geo: neata :)
Geo: multumesc tare mult de urari
Geo: asa este
Geo: intru cand si cum pot
Geo: acum am o sedinta, trebuie sa ajung
Geo: nu am nici un chef
Geo: e luni, sunt obosit
Geo: frec duda pe net
Geo: pana cand o sa ma sune aia ca am intarziat
Geo: imi fac de cap :)  "

mpq

http://www.break.com/index/blonde-solution-to-global-warming-2072831
Tell the world !!!

mpq

http://www.break.com/pictures/truth-in-packaging-2072873

Tiberiukia

O tanara se adreseaza vanzatoarei de la un magazin de cosmetice:
- As dori ca barbatul meu sa imi acorde mai multa atentie. Aveti cumva un parfum care miroase ca un computer?

Tiberiukia

Vand parfum cu miros de internet explorer si yahoo messenger

typsy

:) Inteligent de tot bancul ala cu institutiile publice..

dnlac

maryjan, bancul propus de tine a mai fost o data bancul zilei. e drept, era sora in locul bunicii [-( ce oameni! :))  a, concluzia: a fost sters