Joke of the Day

gyovy

Buna dimineatza! :*:*:*:*:* Cine vrea, sunt gratis!

maryjan

buna dimi

nemrac

Intr-un spital,la sectia "donari" astepta o doamna.Intra un domn.Uimit acesta intreaba:
EL:Donati sperma?
EA:Nu,donez un ovar pt 50 de euro.
EL:Eu donez sperma pt 100 de euro.
Dupa o vreme cei doi se intalnesc din nou in aceeasi sectia a spitalului.
EL:Donati si celalalt ovar?
Neputand sa vorbeasca pt ca avea gura plina,ea face semn din cap ca "nu"

mpq

Abort, Retry, Ignore?
Once upon a midnight dreary, fingers cramped and vision bleary, System manuals piled high and wasted paper on the floor, Longing for the warmth of bed sheets, still I sat there doing spreadsheets. Having reached the bottom line I took a floppy from the drawer, I then invoked the SAVE command and waited for the disk to store, Only this and nothing more.

Deep into the monitor peering, long I sat there wond'ring, fearing, Doubting, while the disk kept churning, turning yet to churn some more. But the silence was unbroken, and the stillness gave no token. "Save!" I said, "You cursed mother! Save my data from before!" One thing did the phosphors answer, only this and nothing more, Just, "Abort, Retry, Ignore?"

Was this some occult illusion, some maniacal intrusion? These were choices undesired, ones I'd never faced before. Carefully I weighed the choices as the disk made impish noises. The cursor flashed, insistent, waiting, baiting me to type some more. Clearly I must press a key, choosing one and nothing more, >From "Abort, Retry, Ignore?"

With fingers pale and trembling, slowly toward the keyboard bending, Longing for a happy ending, hoping all would be restored, Praying for some guarantee, timidly, I pressed a key. But on the screen there still persisted words appearing as before. Ghastly grim they blinked and taunted, haunted, as my patience wore, Saying "Abort, Retry, Ignore?"

I tried to catch the chips off guard, and pressed again, but twice as hard. I pleaded with the cursed machine: I begged and cried and then I swore. Now in mighty desperation, trying random combinations, Still there came the incantation, just as senseless as before. Cursor blinking, angrily winking, blinking nonsense as before. Reading, "Abort, Retry, Ignore?"

There I sat, distraught, exhausted, by my own machine accosted. Getting up I turned away and paced across the office floor. And then I saw a dreadful sight: a lightning bolt cut through the night. A

mpq

An artist, a lawyer, and a computer scientist are discussing the merits of a mistress. The artist tells of the passion, the thrill which comes with the risk of being discovered. The lawyer warns of the difficulties. It can lead to guilt, divorce, bankruptcy. Not worth it. Too many problems. The computer scientist says "It's the best thing that's ever happened to me. My wife thinks I'm with my mistress. My mistress thinks I'm home with my wife, and I can spend all night on the computer!"

nemrac

INTREBARE:
Cum numesti un bumerang care nu functioneaza?
RASPUNS:
Bat

Adyctin

A bea un pahar de vin in fiecare zi, se considera a fi un lucru util. Astazi am facut multe lucruri utile...:P

Adyctin

Cum poti sa excelezi la birou?
Pasul 1: Deschizi un Excel.
Pasul 2: Incepi sa "excelezi"!

Adyctin

I: Ce zice un manelist la tribunal atunci cand divorteaza?
R: Soooloooo!

sk8raven

Mai e putin si formatia mea de suflet lanseaza un album now :) Can't wait!

Anjin

Nightwish Rulz

mpq

Tech Support: "OK Bob, let's press the control and escape keys at the same time. That brings up a task list in the middle of the screen. Now type the letter 'P' to bring up the Program Manager." Customer: "I don't have a 'P'." Tech Support: "On your keyboard, Bob." Customer: "What do you mean?" Tech Support: "'P' on your keyboard, Bob." Customer: "I'm not going to do that!"