Joke of the Day

kbazuka

neatza marijan

fara_cont

"Son, I found a condom in your room"
"Gee, thanks, Grandpa!"
"Why are you calling me Grandpa?"
"Because I couldn't find it yesterday."

fara_cont

Herschel meets Moshe who was looking very happy.
"What are you so happy about, Moshe?"
"Herschel, all my problems are solved, I bought an elephant!"
"What are you talking about? We're old friends, don't lie to me!"
"I tell you! You know my auto park? I get the elephant to wash them every day, he shines them with the tail, he polishes... And the wife, you know how she loves gardening? Well the elephant waters the flowers every day with his trunk. Oh, Herschel, and the kids love him! He picks them up with the trunk, he takes them on a stroll, he plays football... All my problems are gone!"
"Oh really? How much did you pay for him?"
"A hundred thousand, but he's worth every penny!"
"I'll buy him from you. I'll pay you double!"
"No way, he's our new member of the family!"
"Feh, three hundred thousand then!"
"Oy vey, fine, you can have him!"
6 months later, they meet again. Moshe is still happy, Herschel looks awful, his hair was thinning, he had circles under his eyes...
"Moshe, you schmuck, you have ruined me with this elephant! He doesn't do anything. That klutz ruined my auto park, he sat on all my cars, dented every panel... I can't go back home either, my family hates me. He took big dumps on my wife's flowers, the whole house smells like manure, and he beat the kids with his trunk. I'm ruined!"
"Herschel, you have a big problem."
"I know, Moshe, it's your damn elephant!"
"No, no, you have an attitude problem. If you talk like that you'll never sell that elephant!"